Sunday, July 13, 2008

Unspoken Words

My life has been anything but picture perfect this week. I would love to spill out all the details here, to vent my anger, my frustration, my pain - to share this part of my life with you my readers.

But I can't. It is too personal, the wounds run to deep. I can not control who reads this blog (well, I could make it by invite only, but I don't want too). And I am fearful that the wrong person would stumble upon my words and further damage would be done.

Suffice it to say, that someone close to me hurt me very deeply. (And no, it was not M). This person has hurt me time and time again. And each time I told myself, 'this is more'. And each time, I would find myself forgiving them and opening myself up for more abuse. I can not seem to walk away.

Perhaps if it was simply a boyfriend or a friend, the bond would be easier to break. But it's family, and that makes it all the more complicated. Yet, this week I reached a breaking point. A point where years of frustration bubbled over - volcanic in their action - and I took a much needed stand.

The reaction from my stand was a pretty as the aftermath of a natural disaster. However, it can not be helped. I must put my needs first - the need to be happy and stress-free. And so I drew the line in the sand....and this time, I won't cross over.